diary

I stumbled across an old diary of mine from when Al was a baby. Actually, Al stumbled across it and read it. She said to me, "I was in my terrible twos mom, you wrote all about it!"

When I sat down and read the entries, the one thing that stuck out was how I felt like I was missing something. "I don't write as much as I used to" I said. "I can't ride my bike like I want to". All these things, because I had a child.

I wasn't missing a thing. I'd take those moments again in a heartbeat!

I do appreciate the blogging, as it helps me write as much as I used to. Now to just get that bike on the road...

I just finished reading both "Wicked" and the "Year of Magical Thinking". Both worth reading. I actually enjoyed Joan Didion's prose so much I went and got another one of her books and started it tonight, "Play it as it Lays" or something like that. I have to tell you when I was in high school, she was the kind of writer I vowed to be. I wanted that life. I wanted to be able to conjure up a poem at the drop of a hat or reference some old literary quote so obscure I'd have to find it to prove to someone I knew it.

Well then I went and majored in Psych instead of English. I just figured with my social anxiety, I would have ended up teaching English to a bunch of bratty teenagers who didn't care what Shelley had to say about anything. I didn't want that.

So now I blog, and that'll do me just fiiiiine.

We have had two contracts on the house fall through, I'm not even in the mood to talk about it. The girls are just stressed out, they just want to KNOW what is going to happen already, and I don't have that answer. I'm going to take a few days off from work, go swimming, have a beer and a pedicure and come back and think about it Monday.

Ciao.